Cuttin' Up in the Miller House

There is a fog that hangs over a tired, overworked Momma. This said Momma has been nursing sick babies, daddies, and herself since November with nary a week in between bouts. So it was bound to happen.....

As you might remember from previous posts, we recently had our credit card information hacked. Since then, we have gotten new credit cards that I just now went to activate..... although I had forgotten to throw away the "hacked" credit cards, thereby trying to activate a flagged account.... and ended up playing Twenty-Questions with a heavily accented, heavily breathing Senior manager named Norm. I can neither confirm nor deny that he thought he was playing the hero by blocking a hardened criminal from going on a shopping spree with a "hacked" credit card. "I'm gonna have to call you back." Click. Ensue search for CORRECT new cards.

Well, at least I know my bank's got it game face on.

After rifling though the desk for the correct cards to activate, and hereby successfully wiping the smirk off Norm's "vigilante-happy visage," I played it smart by cutting up the hacked cards.

I promise. This story isn't as boring as it seems.

Fast-forward. Kroger. The Next Day. I try to use my debit card.
Card Declined
swipe
Card Declined
swipe
Card Declined

I swear, lady, I HAVE $47 in the bank. Heh heh. (sweating profusely)

I try another card..... and pick my jaw up off the floor when I realize it is the exact same card... with different numbers. Be cool. Just pay.

swipe duplicate card
Card Accepted

(See! I told you I had $47! Hah!)

But not too smugly....because, after all, I have just realized that instead of cutting up my hacked card..... I have destroyed my debit card instead.

I should have led by pointing out that both the credit and the debit cards are the exact same shade of blue AND both say the name of the bank.

Another fun call to the bank. Uh, yes, I know you think I'm a credit card thief  but can you send me a debit card too?

At least the teller was nice enough to sign me up for the Disney Princess debit card.... just so I don't get them mixed up again. I think it's time to crawl back under that rock from which I just prematurely emerged.

Please tell me I'm not the first person in the world to accidentally cut up my own debit card. I'm sure this'll be funny when I'm not sweating bullets in Kroger somewhere with a line of people pretending not to notice.